Feel the fear and do it anyway!!!
So, I haven’t written on my blog for ooh
almost at least a year! Except maybe a little re blog post somewhere…..
The reason I started this blog was because I wanted to write- I’ve always wanted to write! And I have stories to tell, (mostly) made up stories that come from my own head, but stories from my own experiences too, and these were what I wanted to share. Once I’d done that, I started to realise my blog was just another pro-crastination tool to stop me actually writing that book!!! Somewhere else (other than my countless notebooks!) to splurge with creative freedom and never actually have to craft it all into a book.
So I stopped blogging (not that anyone except my mum read it anyway!) I don’t think the blogging world missed me much, let’s put it that way!
Anyway,around the time I was giving up blogging to focus on a real book, a psychic told me I was scared of success. She said “you want people to like you so much that your scared success will make them dislike you or judge you. It’s holding you back in your business and your writing!” Fear of succeeding was as much an issue for me as fear of failure.
So I made a choice to write a book I’d wanted to do for a long time. A collections of love stories from real military wives and girlfriends. The strength behind the strong. By writing other people’s stories it made me accountable- I had to finish, because I told them I would. I also decided to do it for charity – another tool of accountability. Who could not finish a charity project just cos they were too busy distracting themselves with their Pinterest world and twitter followers? The modern world with all it’s tools of engagement is a minefield for people like me, who constantly seek approval, and whose imagination is vivid enough to actually disappear a little into my Pinterest life.
Anyway, I had no idea how hard it would be! To write other people’s stories in a way that they liked and that fitted with your book idea, and which did them justice because so many people play down their achievements. To write for others in more ways than just readers- a brave or stupid move. I’m not sure which yet!
So for the last year I have been on a merry go round, roller coaster ride with a huge learning curve of self publishing thrown in! (Did I mention I also suffer with vertigo and dizziness? My nan used to call me “dizzy lizzy”) I also have driven my husband quietly insane starting every conversation- “in my book…” (Like the girl in American pie “and this one time at band camp!”)
But it’s done!!!!! 🎉✨🎉💋 I have written my book. I am very close to getting it into print.
But it’s not over yet…… I still have to learn how to market my book, I have to build up a social media presence. I have to SELL THEM!!!!!
I also have to edit it, and this is proving harder than I imagined.
I know People support this project- it genuinely is an awesome idea (I don’t mind blowing my own trumpet here!) but what if they don’t like the finished product. I am sure it will be smaller/ thinner than they imagined ( I only had a limited number of volunteers and had to harass a few old friends to get involved too!) but worst fear of all – what if there are spelling mistakes!!!! 😱
This,to me, is a cardinal sin in books and the self publishing world has unfortunately made it all too common! But here I am about to put my baby into the world and I know how hard it is to get every little error, to make stories sound as though they were written in different ‘voices’, to make similar stories interesting and engaging, to spot every tiny typo!!!!!!!!!! I genuinely used to have to read a dictionary as punishment when I was a little girl- so I know I’m good at spelling- but I am TERRIBLE at typing!! And predictive text makes that 100 times worse……
So after all that look out for my book! 📚 It’s going to be awesome, and please don’t hate on me for typos!! Grammatical errors I am more than happy to discuss! – Everyone needs improvement and educating there ….. But please don’t mention the spelling!!!
With love and big kisses 💋xxxx